I skipped a week and this is 2 days but here is my list lol
Wale "Sabatoge" (I'm so stuck on his album right now)
Jessie J. "Domino" (this song just makes me happy)
Rihanna "You da One" (I hated this song when I first heard it but now I love it)
Floetry "Say Yes" ( I took it back...I just had to!)
Mary Mary "Survive" (great pumped gospel song)
Since this past summer, maybe even closer to the end of spring I had decided to just stop wrapping myself around the idea of a fairy tale romance happening for me. When I say fairytail, I mean the classic (but not so abundant anymore) style of guy meets girl, introduces himself, gets her number, askes her out, and it works out for the long haul. You know marriage,kids and all that good stuff. I never had a huge unrealistic way of looking at love (some of my friends may disagree lol) because I ovbiously knew that's not the way it always goes, but I did think it was possible. Before, I did have a greater notion that it was possible for that to happen for me. I'm getting older and so far I have had no luck. Thus the change of thinking on my part since last summer late spring. A lot of this change came from dissapointments in sitiations from guys who I really liked. Situations where I put myself out ther, told them that I liked them,and all I got back was " I like you just as a friend". It stung a bit,but a least I finally knew and I felt proud that I told them otherwise I would have been stuck having feelings for someone who does not feel the same. I cant feel any angst towards someone who has the balls to tell me the truth right? After the dissapointment went away I realized that you just can't help who you like and don't like and sometimes it just happens the way you hoped it wouldn't. Anywho, since I made that change of thinking (where its just whatever if it happens or not) I've been getting hit on but by bad boys and guys I just did not expect to ever get hit on by. So the good boys that I liked before turned out to be no fun in retrospesct and seemed essentially boring by some standards compared to the crazyiness these bad boys who are now hollerin at me brought but they are no good at all. I have yet to go out with any of them (when I say any, I mean just 3 guys total don't wanna make it seem like there are a whole bunch of them) but I have talked and chatted a bit with them, long enough to see they aren't right for me. I do not, by all means, have room to be picky but I also am not going to settle. The things these guys want I'm not offering so that is that. But I will say it is nice to be wanted. To have someone call you and just chat. Their intentions may be to get the goods, but honestly I found them to be a lot more easy to talk to because even if that is what they are going for, (I'm not giving that up) and I made that known to them in the beginning, at least they know what they want. Now I'm just waiting for the guy who will come at me with the pure true interest of getting to know me.
Not all but most Indie movies that I have watched always have ambigious endings. I just thought about this after watching "The Art of Getting By", which I don't even know if its classified as one but I loved it. There was some frustration surrounded by the main male character who is a senior in highschool but has absolutley no motivation for essentially living until he meets a young lady who changes all of that for him. The plot alone could easily apply to a late 90's highschool boy-find-girl-looses-girl-gets-girl-back kinda film but there was something ginuine about this guys misanthropic behavior that couldn't hide behind cheesy music or synchronized dancing. The story line was so relatable but not at the same time. If that makes any sense lol. All in all I enjoyed it and the ending left you with questions, but good questions. Questions that help you the viewer stop and think what could really be next for the characters. And like the principal of the school told this guy, after he had given up and finally came to do what he needed to do, "anything is possible", I was actually left with that feeling is the most not so cheesy, but motivating way.
So I just realized my idea of relaxing at home tonight is super girly. It consists of....
Sushi (well that's not girly at all) next.....
A copy of InStlye magazine
Glee Concert on DVD
Painting my nails
Eating chocolate
And listening to Beyonce's last 3 albums
Many people are big fans or the smoothie kind of fruit juices but I am. I would think the biggest reason why people don't like them is because of how pricey they can be. This I do not like either but I'm a suker for them and when I have the extra funds or am just completly fiening for one I get it. The Naked brand is probably my favorite. Last week I got lucky because they had them on sale at two places for 2 for $5 bucks. Usually they are around $2.70 and I know what you're thinking, that isn't really a big leap in savings, but what you don't know is that these drinks hardly ever go on sale. With that said I bought like 6. Breaking the bank, yes, I broke it, but in doing so I discoverd the orange carrot one which is now my favorite!!!! I don't think of the drinks as smoothies. I think of them more as thick juice drinks. Either way they mighty tasty.
I haven't cooked in a while and I love to cook! I've just been hella busy with work and unfortunately I was subdued by the eating out way more than I should have been. But I've made some changes in my working life and one thing I wanted to get back to first was cooking. So after a trip to the Fresh Market with my sis and watching that Sarah lady's PBS cooking show on making one meal a week a vegetarian one (btw pbs cooking shows are awesome) I was inspired to make..da da da da... mini veggie pizza or it could be an open face sandwich of sorts made with toasted naan, a good spread of a tablespoon or more of store brought orginal hummus (Fresh market brand) topped with a simple sautee of onions, red peppers and spinach season with a bit of garlic powder and salt and pepper. I also added the spinach right at the end because I didn't number 1 want to cook out the nutrients too much and number 2 have it be super soggy so I cooked it till it just wilted a bit. I like fresh spinach. With it I made a side of cous cous (roasted garlic flavor from the box) which I had never had or made before and was super easy and surprisingly yummy! I tore up this lunch! I mean it turned out better than I thought and when I was done I kept thinking wow it didn't even have meat!
Banana pudding is what I consider and underated dessert. By all means it is not my favorite but I surely enjoy it. Its not one of thoes desserts that they make into other desserts like cheesecake. Ex. Cheescake flavor icecream, cheescake pops ect. As you can tell I am a dessert coniseour lol. No really I love making and eating desserts. Its a huge stress reliever. Its also a huge unhealthy hobby but I like to bake for others. but here is the poing I've come to about banana pudding. Sometimes I put myself into the category of a banana pudding. Sometimes I feel underated, not very popular, an unappreaciated flavor. When I really want to be the most decadent of chocolate cakes served at one of those super fancy a** restaraunts garnished with gold leaf bits. Yes, this speaks volumes to my confidence level, but honestly that is the level I am at. Don't get my wrong, I don't feel like this 24/7 7days, there are just moments when I feel (like other human beings) that I'm not at where I would like to be. But top point is that I have a goal to be more and do more so that one day I can be more than gelatin and whipped hydrogenated oil lol. This sounds so silly in retrospect. I'm just a silly person.:)
I just got off the phone with my sis and we talked about a bunch of stuff but mostly it was centered on work and stress and she said she was told today that "vengence is His". And I so go it! Sometimes you really have to sit back and let people look stupid. Kill people with kindness because as soon as you stoop down to their level or ignornace and inconsideration you let them have power over you which leads to a stress that you have the ability to avoid. We are all never above the fall. Meaning there will be so many times in our lives where we will mess up and do the wrong thing, but these are our lessons and its what makes us who we are. When we see others making their own mistakes, its is not our job to push them down even deeper or join in making the situation even more miserable. Sometimes we gotta step back and let God take it because that stress we don't need. Yes, sometimes it is hard to let it go because our pride and ego is what stands in the way but your pride and ego stands no match to that of God whose power overrules all things. I have always known to have faith in Him, but this conversation with my sister again reinforced this and the lesson could not have come at a more operative time. I have some decisions to make and which ever way I go I have to have faith that God will provide.
I have not had a full fledge bubble-bath-till-your-toes-prune in a very long time. I decided since I had a little free time I would do this for myself. So I over did the bubbles turned on my pandora and relaxed. I forgot how calming it was. I didn't stay in until my toes pruned up because sadly I have other things that had to be done but I stayed in long enough to have a mental break and just be. My weekend is almost over. Back to work tomorrow in the am. Today, overall, went pretty well. I worked my second job. No horrible customers! Got of only an hour after I was suppose to and had time for myself. I think I'm gonna start reading a book my friend gave me and then hit the hay. I really wish I could catch up on all my shows. Maybe ill have time for that next weekend.
I haven't woken up without an agenda in a really long time. Sleep is truly a luxury. I find myself thinking constantly why am I in a position where I stay so busy and make little time for mental restoration when I know at some point I will probably lose my mine. The answer is because I'm crazy. Jk. No really I feel at some point all this hard work will PAY off. I've been on my "get money" tip for a while now. So far no drastic changes. It mostly looks like I'm working and working and working and nothing new is really happening. I have goals but I need to really sit and plan them out. Oh, but when will that ever happen if I don't have the time. So for now I will say eventually I will get there.
I don't know why I am always sucked in by starbucks. They have taken a huge chunk of my cashflow since my freshman year of college when I discoverd their frappachinos (probably spelt that wrong). :)
I spend a lot of time in the car driving back and forth to work. So I listen to a lot of music in the car.Most stations play the same stuff over and over (the most popular) but I listen to pandora and look at blogs when I have extra time. I hope to be able to post every week the top 5 songs that were implanted in my mind. So here are the top 5 songs for this first week of the new year that are currently stuck in my head and sung on repeat.
Rhianna "Talk that Talk"
Fun. Feat.Janelle Monae "We Are Young" (crazy video :) )
Lady Antebellum "Just a Kiss"
Chris Brown "Strip"
Wale "Ambition"
Today I receive a cute but touching pin from a parent of a student I teach. I am an Instructional Assistant for children with Autism. This has by far been my most challenging but most rewarding job. I love love love the kids I work with. I find myself randomly thinking of better ways to teach them and have fun with them when I'm not working. They have taught me as much as I have taught them. I've volunteered my time at libraries and museums and did similar things for the better cause of the community but I think teaching these kids feels like I am truly giving back. To get this pin from a parent reinforces this. I am proud to teach amazing kids.
I'm sitting here with my girls and talking about relationships and guys and I'm just really uhhhg on the subject at this point. I've never been in love. That's right I'm 24 and I've never been in love. It gets worse. I also have never had a boyfriend before. I'm the single one of my group of friends and I truly get tired of hearing people tell me "oh no you don't want to be in a relationship, its so hard" or " guys are just heartbreakers". Well duh! This I already know, but love takes having a lot of wrongs. Nothing worth having is easy right? I love my girls and I love all our talks on the subject but I'm ready to be able to really contribute to the conversation without being the one who looks like I don't know ish. :)
